mistake

Coping with Mistakes

By: Phelicitus A.

What comes to your mind anytime you encounter such a topic? Generally, a mistake is a decision or an action that we come to regret. The concept of mistake is tied to the larger notion of failure. From a personal perspective I disagree with this, the reality is that mistakes are unavoidable when you are still learning to master the skills you need in order to succeed.  It is altogether human, to struggle towards what we’re trying to achieve. And so to refer to this process as failure is very destructive and self defeating.

Mistakes help us grow and develop. Our past mistakes push us to the next level, it may not be where we want to be but it definitely isn’t where we were before. The past mistakes may bring in our lives painful events like loss, struggle, anger and humiliation, making us cautious and afraid to do wrong. The irony is that these events which we try so hard to avoid may be precisely what we need to experience. Without these experiences people would not have the opportunity to discover deeper truths about themselves. Sometimes experiencing pain and struggle can help you understand who you are.

There is abundant opportunity to learn and grow through these painful experiences as they are a fundamental part of our learning process. Mel Schwartz. L. C SW in his articles on “a shift of mind” states that the fear of making such errors keeps us imprisoned in the very narrow comfort zone of the known. Yet it is the movement into the unknown that catalyzes our personal evolution. He adds that if you are excited about new experiences and opportunities for growth then you’ll be less likely to default to the concept of a mistake.

The most essential thing when you make a mistake is taking responsibility for what happened. By accepting it and moving forward rather than beating yourself up over it. Here are a few things we can do to help us cope with the mistakes:

You are not your mistake

First it’s important to remember you are not your mistake. When you make a mistake, have in mind that it doesn’t define who you are as a person. Don’t be too hard on yourself and don’t be judgemental. Everybody makes mistakes.

Own your mistake

Take responsibility for your mistake, own what happened and draw a line under it. Accept you are at fault as this is the first step to help you figure out what to do next. Don’t make excuses for yourself because this will probably just prolong the process.

Recognise your mistake

It has to be clear to you as to what you did wrong. This can help you bury the mistake or put it in the past. Don’t confuse what your mistake was, you can also try talking to those involved so you are completely sure of what not to do next time.

Find a solution and act on it

Most problems have a solution and if you’ve stuffed it up, take time to think about what you could do to improve the situation, things may not be as bad as you initially thought. 

Talk it out

Sometimes you may feel that the mistake you made is a huge one and therefore you deserve to carry all that weight alone, you don’t have to. Talk to your mates or family about it. They might just say something sensible making you feel a little better. 

In conclusion, it’s human nature to error and if only we could learn from them. Most often we think we have learned from our past mistakes  but we don’t because if we did we couldn’t be doing the same mistakes over and over. We only declare our torment and vow to refrain from experiencing it once more. We collect our bad memories and carve them in our minds. And fail to recall the exact emotions we felt. We acknowledge the incident, but rarely the consequences. 

We’ve made events in our life bigger causing ourselves a lot of trauma. Let’s enjoy what we go through. If there is one thing we need to learn is how to view life with a different perspective. Embrace your mistakes, they are what makes up life. It’s not that bad after all. 

12 Replies to “mistake”

  1. Avatar
    Ecofinds says: 11 May, 2020 at 5:45 pm

    I think it is important to get through life knowing everything you wrote here, life is easier this way.

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    Astrid says: 12 May, 2020 at 12:52 am

    I agree that mistakes help you grow. I’ve made many mistakes and failed many times in my lifetime. Those mistakes are what made me who I am today.

  3. Avatar
    Lisa says: 12 May, 2020 at 10:32 am

    Owning your mistake is so important. It helps me to grow and reflect.

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    Ashlee says: 12 May, 2020 at 1:57 pm

    I agree. It’s so important to recognize that a mistake is just that a mistake, what follows can be dealt with and you should forgive yourself , learn from it and stop punishing yourself over it. We so often live in the energy of the thing we did wrong that we rarely allow ourselves to heal, learn and use this information to better ourselves and others.

  5. Avatar
    Kristine Nicole Alessandra says: 12 May, 2020 at 2:44 pm

    This is a really uplifting read. Sometimes I dwell on thoughts like this – like my whole life is a mistake. I pray a lot when I get feelings like that. I should also try to be more positive and be grateful for the lessons I have learned through those mistakes.

    1. Mercy
      Mercy says: 15 May, 2020 at 10:28 am

      I pray a lot too sometimes when all i feel is negativity. Thank for sharing 🙂

  6. Avatar
    Isowa says: 12 May, 2020 at 3:01 pm

    Yes, most definitely, mistakes help you learn and grow.

  7. Avatar
    Catherine says: 12 May, 2020 at 5:19 pm

    Mistakes happen it’s a part of life but I truly feel that they can be great learning experiences and in certain situations can be an opportunity to grow closer to people. It’s important to recognize your imperfections and own up to them.

  8. Avatar
    All Rio says: 12 May, 2020 at 6:31 pm

    True inspiration and guidance to the right path

  9. Avatar
    Samantha says: 13 May, 2020 at 6:14 am

    I think separating yourself from the mistake is so important. It can be easy to think that you are your mistake. I think we’re conditioned to see mistakes as the worst thing that can happen instead of being something to learn from. If we’re taught at any early age that mistakes are nothing to fear, we’d be much better off.

    1. Mercy
      Mercy says: 13 May, 2020 at 9:36 am

      Totaly agree with yor view.

  10. Avatar
    Melanie williams says: 13 May, 2020 at 11:04 am

    There is some really sensible and sound advice here for sure. Simple own the mistake is a must x

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